Capri Pants.

There ought to be a law prohibiting women over forty from wearing Capri pants. While Capri pants are “cute” on younger women, they look dorky on older women. And I blame Martha Stewart for the reemergence of this fashion trend in older women.

When an older woman wears Capri pants, she is making a fashion statement. She is saying that she still doesn’t know how to buy clothes that fit. Plus, there is nothing pretty about showing off those blue veins in her ankles.

I put Capri pants in the same category as Leisure Suits. Not only should they go away permanently, they should never have happened in the first place.  Where are the fashion police when you need them?

“Do Not Use This Table…”

I just finished doing my taxes for the City of Lansing. What a mess!

It seems that after 20 years they have decided to redesign their tax form. Unfortunately, they have made it much more confusing and complicated.

The instructions reference forms that don’t exist and tables that are missing. I think the instructions were written by someone who was not fluent in the English language. And, this is the corrected version. The original was not usable.

For example, the instructions above one table state “Do not use this table unless you have be a resident for the past 12 months”. What was the table for? Why to prorate taxes for people who have not been a resident for the past 12 months. I think they meant to say “…if you have been..”

On one of the work sheets it asks you to indicate “T, S, B”. I have no idea what “T, S, B” mean and the instructions don’t tell you. I left it blank.

Well, I suspect the city has gotten a lot of flack for the crappy form. Maybe they will do better next year.

“God is Punishing Me!”

Kwame Kilpatrick, the mayor of Detroit and the states most famous Irishman, claims that all of his legal troubles are punishment from God for the sins that he committed.

In reality, he knows that his legal problems are the result of his lying under oath. But the punishment statement sounds better to his constituents. After all, he is under pressure to resign so maybe he can convince the people that he doesn’t need any punishment from the public.

All he needs now is for Jeffery Fieger, Michigan’s most famous lawyer, to represent him in court and it will be a real three ring circus.

“Forgetting Sarah Marshall”.

Last night, Kathy and I went to see the movie “Forgetting Sarah Marshall”. It was a comedy chick flick about a guy who gets dumped by his TV star girl friend after a 5 year relationship.

In an effort to forget Sarah Marshall, he goes on vacation to Hawaii where he meets a new girl and falls in love with her. Unfortunately, while he is there, he runs into his old girl friend and her new boy friend.

I don’t know which was funnier, the movie or the 6 elderly women who sat behind us.

Any one who has ever had their heart broken can identify with the story. All and all, it was a very funny movie with a very nice story line.

Take Your Child to Work Day.

Yesterday, as I was sitting in the stall, I heard a high little voice. I said to my self that the voice sounded like that of a little girl. But how could that be? This is the men’s restroom. I emerged from the stall only to encounter a 3 year old and her dad.

I must be old fashioned because I don’t think that the men’s restroom is the proper place for a little girl. I am sure that there are enough women in the office who would be happy to accompany the little girl into the women’s restroom. That is what I did when I took my daughters to work with me.

While I understand that it is a liberated world, I hate having to answer questions about the men standing next to the wall.

Tennessee Kabuki.

The other day, I was eating in an Oriental  restaurant with my friend Quy. In the back ground, there was Oriental music being played on Oriental instruments. This was typical of Oriental restaurants.

As I was listening to the music, I recognized one of the tunes. It was The Tennessee Waltz.

I could envision some Ninja listening to this song and crying in his Saki.

Wilson Returns!

Our parking ramp was the home for a stray cat named Wilson. He was called Wilson because all you could see was his eyes as they peered out from box that he slept in. While he was provided with food and water from the staff, his main focus was hunting at night.

Well, a few weeks back, some do gooder decided that Wilson needed a real home. So they set up an animal trap to capture Wilson. And sure enough, Wilson was captured and a explanation note was posted above his box. It said that he was moved to a real home where he would be fed and cared for.

Well, guess what? When I was walking through the parking ramp yesterday, I saw Wilson. I guess the good life didn’t appeal to him so he ran away only to return to his beloved parking ramp.

Since most people don’t actually live in Lansing, I am guessing that he traveled several miles to return to his real home.

So much for the good life.


The other day, I had to go to Saginaw on business. And fortunately, I do not have to make the trip very often. But when I do go, my preferred road is I-75.

I-75 is a multi lane road with up to 4 lanes in each direction. Today, as I was driving it, I noticed that it drops from 4 lanes to 3 lanes.

I found this lane reduction to be quit odd. Usually, lane reductions occur when you leave a city or an interchange, but not this one. This one just occurs in the middle of no where. So, all of the drivers that were occupying 4 lanes now have to occupy 3 with no chance of getting off.

This, of course, turns a busy road into a congested road. And, this road is a main artery for weekend recreation so it is double worse on Fridays.

Maybe they just ran out of money when they were building the road?

French Fry.

Recently, a guy was selling a single french fry on Ebay. He claimed that the french fry was 16 years old. The fry was dropped in his car when he bought it 16 years ago and wasn’t discovered until he cleaned up his car so he could sell it.

Well, I have a couple of problems with that. First of all, I doubt that a french fry would last for 16 years even under the best of conditions. Secondly, how does he know that the french fry is really 16 years old?

Did he only eat french fries once the whole time that he had the car? And if so, how could he prove it.

More importantly, why would anyone want a french fry that was 16 years old? But then again, stranger things than that have been sold on Ebay.