I recently attended a training class at one of the State of Michigan’s conference centers.  But, judging by the number of signs posted, the facility manager must be a control freak with a whole lot time on her hands.

Of course, there were the standard signs about room usage such as shutting off the lights and keeping the room clean.  But then, the signs seemed to take on a life of their own.

Now, when most people see a large red metallic cylinder hanging on the wall, they think “Fire Extinguisher.”  But, just in case you are unsure, there is a sign above it which reads “Fire Extinguisher.  And, in case you are unsure about the square red box on the wall with the handle on it which says “In case of fire pull down”,   there is a  sign above it which reads “Fire Alarm.”

There were signs telling you not to remove chairs from the rooms.  There were signs telling you not move the AV equipment right next to signs telling you to put the AV equipment back after you have moved it.  And there were signs telling you not unplug equipment.

Fortunately, the signs have not moved into the bathrooms.  At least not yet.

I recently attended a training class at one of the State of Michigan conference centers.  Since I had never been there before, I needed directions.

Everyone told me that it was at the end of the road and through the gate.  That  sounded easy enough.  But, when I drove through the gate, all I found was a large vehicle maintenance garage.  But, I did notice another sign pointing me through the next gate followed by another sign pointing me through another gate.

Finally, I arrived at the conference center.  But, as I parked my car, I realized that I was the only person there.  Lots of gates and high fences but no people.

I tried the front door but a sign announced that the building was closed.  Then I  wondered, why three sets of gates and three sets of fences?  Why is the door locked?  What are these people afraid of?  I got back into my car and locked the doors.  I spent the next 20 minutes surveying the country side.

I guess I watched too many horror movies as a kid.

It used to be that tail gate parties were just a lunch before the big game.  Then they turned into breakfast and lunch.   But recently, they have started to become a week long event.  And, some of these tailgaters never even make it to the game as the focus has changed from the game to the tailgate party.

I wonder how many of them even remember the party?

Back in 1905 Horatio S. Earle decided that the roads in Michigan were a mess and needed to be improved from the mud ruts that they were.  So, he campaigned for a highway system for the State of Michigan.  And, he put through legislation forming Michigans first department of transportation.  The department of transportation was so grateful for all of his efforts that they named an obscure conference center, attached to a maintenance garage, after him.

I wonder if they called him “Ho” for short?

The other day, when I was at the tire store, there was an elderly man in there arguing with the store manager.  It seems that several years ago, he bought 4 new tires for his Mercedes and a warranty for the tires from the store.  And, he now had a defective tire on his car and wanted a free replacement.

Unfortunately, the defective tire was a different brand than the ones that he had purchased from the store.  But, the man claimed that these were the tires that he had purchased.  So if the tire was a different brand then is was the fault of the tire store.

Needless to say, the store manager was skeptical but offered to replace the tire for half price.  The man however demanded a FREE replacement.

Like the store manager, I too was skeptical.  Reputable tire stores will always sell you tires as a set of four and not a mixture.

I suspect that the fourth tire was replaced for some reason with a different brand after the sale.  Maybe it was the spare.  But, more to the point, if you can’t afford $100 for a replacement tire, then maybe you shouldn’t be driving a Mercedes.

10 cent millionaires are a dime a dozen in GR.

With the Lions winning, I have to wonder if hell is going to freeze over?   Is the end of the world near?

Nostradamus, eat your heart out!!

Amazon is now selling a phone holder for bicycles.  It mounts on the handlebars right next to the neck.  And, by using the speaker phone option, you can ride your bike and talk at the same time.

I guess the bag is cheaper than getting a Bluetooth.

The other day, a co-worker and I were eating lunch on the patio of an East Lansing restaurant when we noticed an attractive young woman, in a business suit, enter the restaurant.  And, we were not surprised to see her seated on the patio as it was a beautiful day.

But, moments after she was seated, she arose and left the patio with the menu still in her hand.  She then walked out to the street and boarded the cross town bus!

Interesting to say the least.  Was she checking prices for a competitor?  Was she learning the menu for a waitress job at the restaurant?  Who knows.  But, it did make for interesting dining.

I guess I need to get out more.

Recently, a man robbed a bank in Grand Rapids.  He made his get away on a bicycle.  Then, a few blocks later, he hopped into a large U haul truck.

The chase went on long enough that the local news crews recorded it on tape for broadcast.  There were a lot of police cars chasing him as speeds up to 40 mph.   It reminded me of the OJ Simpson chase.

During the course of the chase, the driver started throwing money out of the window of the truck.  And, when he wasn’t throwing money, he was making obscene gestures at the media and police.

Eventually, he tried to hide the truck in a parking lot but a large cargo truck is rather conspicuous.   He was apprehended a few minutes later.

I guess it pays to plan ahead.

A Representative in Florida has introduced legislation which  will allow dwarf tossing.

Back in 1989, Florida passed a law banning dwarf tossing.  But, the Representative feels that this law impairs dwarfs from gainful employment.  After all, no one is forcing the dwarfs to participate in these contests.   And if they are adults, they should be allowed to make their own choices.

And while I have never seen a dwarf tossing contest, I suspect that alcohol is involved.