Lowell has a store that specializes in custom fitted saddles. It is right on main street.

Now, in order to have a custom fitted saddle, you need to provide the horse for which that saddle will be used. This means that just about every Saturday, there is a horse trailer on main street and of course, a horse.

While this may sound like the wild west, in actuality, most of the horses are used for polo. I guess if you can afford to have four polo ponies and the trailer to haul them, you can afford a custom saddle for each one.

Life is good.

The other morning, I went through the drive through and ordered a black decaf. The voice on the other end of the box asked if I wanted any cream or sugar with my black decaf. I thanked them for asking and then stated that I would just have my black decaf black.

My carpooler is always getting music CDs from the local library so that we can listen to them on the way to work. Of course, he just loads them into the CD player and then goes to sleep. So, I get stuck driving and listening to the music he has selected. And, since most of the music we have never heard before, each CD is a new experience.

Well, the other morning, he loaded up a contemporary instrumental CD for my listening pleasure. The fourth track was an Avant Gard number that repeated the same phrase over and over again with a little variation each time that it played.

The song was OK but a little tedious. However, when it moved on to the fifth track, I heard the same musical phrasing. That is when I realized that the CD was defective.

I will let him listen to it on the way home while I sleep.

Peanut butter and honey are my nemesis.  Together or separately, they manage to get all over me.  Kind of like the stain in the Cat in the Hat.

They both seem to hide on my fingers only to emerge  when I touch something else.  And, from the area that I have touched, they set up a base camp with the intent of covering my entire body.  In the end, I make my final stand at the sink where I end up eradicating them completely.

When I was in the post office the other day, there was a young man ahead of me buying stamps. Proud of his country, he stated that he wanted stamps with the flag on them.

When he received his stamps, he announced that he was going into the military and that he was leaving for the Merchant Marine Academy in a few weeks.

Well, I had never associated the Merchant Marines with the military so this made me wonder. Had he joined the Marines and mistakenly called them the Merchant Marines? Or was he really going to school to become a Merchant Marine?

When he asked the postal worker if they rented bank vaults, I concluded that he must be going into the Marines.  But, one way or another, he is going to be surprised.

A woman in England recently gave birth.  What is so unusual is that she did not know she was giving birth until the baby slid down her pant leg.

Maybe if she had been taking a shower, she might have noticed something unusual.

A two year old girl in England is reported to have the same IQ as Bill Gates. I suppose it would be wrong to say that Bill Gates has the same IQ as a two year old, though after Vista you have to wonder.

Mr. mom gave birth again.  This is the same guy who made the news a while back when he gave birth.

I am sorry, any guy who has a vagina instead of a penis is not a guy, he is a woman.  And what about his wife.  Doesn’t she think that there is a little something missing from their marriage?  And since he seems to get pregnant all of the time, doesn’t she suspect that maybe he is seeing another man?

But, I guess she is well fed and has a roof over her head so she can’t be too critical.  I suppose if she got pregnant he would suspect that there was another man.  Or maybe the same one.

I was recently reading an article about a new product just for men. It is called the Wonder Shirt. Made from spandex, it has special fitted panels to help men maintain a better figure, kind of like a girdle.

While the product looked interesting, at $89 it will be a while before I get one.

Over the years, I have learned that elevators are not safe places to be, particularly here at the State. So, I was a little concerned when I could see a woman holding the elevator for me even though I was a ways from the door.

When I got on the elevator, I thanked her for holding the door. Then, when I went to push the button for my floor, she said “here, I’ll get it for you.”

Now, this was a woman that I had never seen before, yet she seemed to know what floor I worked on. A quick check of her left hand revealed that she was not wearing a wedding ring.  Bad sign!

I suppose she could have been married and just not wearing a ring. But the way she was gazing at me led me to believe she had romantic interests in mind.

When the elevator arrived at my floor, I started for the door and so did she. Since there were just the two of us on the elevator and since she had pushed the button for another floor, I didn’t really think she intended to get off at my floor.

I suddenly had a sense of urgency that I needed to get out of that elevator NOW! Moving as quickly as I could, I got out of that elevator. Then I heard her whisper “Bye”.

As the doors were closing, I glanced back only to she her standing there making a little waving motion with her hand.

I have got to start using the stairs more.