Dr. Death is out of prison. For those of you who are not from the area, Dr. Death is aka Dr. Jack Kevorkian, a former pathologist from the Detroit area.

He went to prison for assisting in suicides. Assisting in suicides is against the law in Michigan but that didn’t stop Dr. Death.

Dr. Death is running for a Michigan congress seat. He claims that the government is corrupt and that he can straighten it out. Well, Dr. Death, you choose to ignore the law, so I guess that doesn’t make you any better than the corrupt politician’s you are opposed to.

Physician, heal thy self.

The Yankees have signed Billy Crystal to play for them. This is not just any Billy Crystal, it is THE Billy Crystal. Apparently, having celebrities on your baseball team is become a popular event. Granted, he is only playing on the farm team but he is playing none the less.

Celebrities playing baseball is a real crowd draw. Not only do you get to see a baseball game, you also get to see a star playing baseball.

Maybe they could get Don Rickel in a coaching position and maybe Bob Newhart as an umpire. The possibilities are fascinating.

I read an article about an 800 pound man. He was going out on a date with his girl friend. Since he couldn’t walk, he had a forklift move him and his bed onto the back of a flatbed truck.

He hadn’t been in the sun for many many years, so they had to improvise a special sun screen to protect him from the rays. Unfortunately, the sun screen fell apart on the way there. So, rather than risk exposure to the heat and sun, he decided to turn around and go back.

You have to wonder what his girlfriend looks like.

We agreed to do a Seder Supper last Sunday for a church in Grand Rapids. When we agreed to do the Seder we didn’t realize that we were going to be in charge of cooking the meal. So we ended up cooking Chicken Marsele for 200 people.

Now in order to feed 200 people, you need about 90 pounds of chicken breasts. And, in order to make Chicken Marsele, you need to brown those chicken breasts.

Now, I was cooking on a ten burner commercial gas range and had two very large skillets. I would fill the first skillet with chicken breast and then start filling the second skillet with chicken.

By the time I got the second skillet filled, it was time to turn the chicken in the first skillet. And, by the time I got the chicken turned in the first skillet, it was time to turn the chicken in the second skillet. And by the time I got the chicken turned in the second skillet, the chicken in the first skillet was done.

This browning process went on for 2 hours. After that, we started assembling the sauce and simmering the chicken breasts in the sauce. All and all, it took us 5 hours to cook the Chicken Marsele. Since it only simmered for 30 minutes, the rest of the time was spent doing prep work. Fortunately, we did it the day before the meal.

Cornell Sanders, eat your heart out.

When I showed off my new Cubic Zirconium ear ring to the women at work, one woman commented that I needed to step up to the counter and buy the real thing.

After I thought about it for awhile, I decided that I could probably buy a cheap pair of diamond ear rings. After all, only a jeweler would know the difference and then only by examining them with a magnifying glass.

But, by the same token, only a jeweler could tell the difference between a diamond and a Cubic Zirconium. So, unless some one asks if the diamond is real, they would assume that it is a fake. And, it would be improper to announce that the ear ring is a real diamond. So, since everyone would assume that the diamond is a fake, I might as well wear the fake.

Besides, I have better things to do with my money like buying a Marshall stack. 🙂

An Irish pub in New York City has banned the playing or singing of O Danny Boy during the month of March. They claim that people buy more drinks when they are happy. And of course, O Danny Boy is a sad and depressing song.

So, to make sure that their pub is a happy place during this Irish holiday, they decided to ban O Danny Boy.

I guess only Flogging Molly is allowed.

I was in Okemos MI recently in what was left of their downtown district. I say “left of their downtown district” because most of the business district of this quaint little town has move a mile north onto the state highway.

But, one of the business that is left in the downtown area is The Travelers Club. Now The Travelers Clubs’ claim to fame is their international restaurant and tuba museum. That’s right, tuba museum.

Some how, a tuba museum doesn’t strike me as being very interesting.  But, what ever.

John Phillips Sousa, eat your heart out.

Our office area has a handicap door. If you push the button, the door will open automatically. This is to help the handicapped people get in and out of the office. We have no handicapped people in our office.

The people across the hall from us have a handicapped person who is in an electric cart. Unfortunately, they do not have a handicapped door. I guess you only get one door per floor.

Some of the women at work though that I should ditch my gold hoop ear ring and get a white gold post with a Cubic Zirconium stone. In fact, they were so sure that it would look good on me that one of the women gave me one of hers to try out for the weekend. And to add to the frenzy, Quy, my boss even put it in my ear for me even though I was quite capable of doing it myself.

When I got home, Kathy also commented on how good it looked. So, I decided to go to Meijer’s (regional grocery chain) and look over their selection.

Now, the jewelry at Meijer’s is always 70% off so I was reasonable sure that the $60 pair of ear rings would be substantially discounted. And they were. For $15 I got a pair of Cubic Zirconium/white gold posts.

The women at work really liked the ear ring and suggested that I step up to the counter and buy a real diamond. I will have to check out Meijer’s this weekend.

It was a cold and snowy day at work so I decided to stay inside for lunch. Of course, staying inside gave me two lunch options. I could either go to the snack bar and purchase a sandwich or I could go down to the cafeteria. So I opted for the cafeteria. After all, if I didn’t like what they were serving, I could always go back to the snack bar.

When I got to the cafeteria I discovered that one of the items that they were serving was beer batter cod with fries. Since it had been a long time since I had had any battered fish, I decided to give it a try.

Judging by the size of the people waiting in line, I should have known what I was in for. And I had forgotten that the cafeteria is best know for starch and grease. But, I was hungry and the cod sounded good, so, I waited in line for my turn at the cod.

When I got my cod and fries, I paid for it and headed back to my office to eat. Once in my office, I opened the container, ready to dig into my cod. But, to my dismay, the cod was buried under a pound of greasy fries. Drat!

After some sorting, I managed to rescue the cod from the fries. This, of course, left my fingers covered with grease, but at least I was able to get at my cod.

I sliced off a chunk and stuck my fork into it. It disintegrated. I managed to scoop it onto my fork with the use of my knife but putting tartar sauce on it was out of the question. When I stuck it in my mouth, it had no taste what so ever, just grease. And thus was the way of the cod.

I tried to eat the fries but they were just plan disgusting. Soggy and greasy. I picked through them looking for some that were a little more crispy but they were few and far between. And while I found them to be unacceptable, I am sure that their abundance pleased the regular patrons.

Next time, I will brave the cold and the snow.